Thursday, January 20, 2011

Plans

Do you have plans for a year from now, two years from now, five years from now, 10?
I don't. I remember being a sophomore in college walking towards the New Engineering Building (is it still called that? its newer, but hardly new by now) and she telling me she didn't know where she would in five years.  I remembering thinking, mom you are talking to a sophomore in college who is engaged, I barely have a one year plan let alone a five year plan. If was concerned about my five year plan, I wouldn't have been engaged. My five year plan that I sent as a senior in high school crumbled all to pieces when I started dating my boyfriend, and I knew the minute I admitted I was dating him every piece of my plan would crumble, except for the get my bachelor degree in a timely manner. My mom continued say, that she had always had a five year plan and she didn't have one. This apparently was worrisome to her, in her defense, she had just recently sent her last baby to college and missed her beautiful, tall, delightful, intelligent children that she had spent almost every day for the last 33 years with. My mother now has a five year plan, and seven years have passed since that conversation, but yet it always pops back into my head, whenever anyone talks about their plans. (Hopefully I don't get in trouble for the story about my mom.)
Seriously how does anyone have a five year plan?
I can't even plan what I want for a year from now.  Seriously!  Seriously, I might say that too much.  I guess I still have a bit of growing up to do.
Back to the point, we aren't even a month into the year and I think my one year plan might have changed at least three times.
The closet my we ever got was planning to the MBA next year not now, back in 2008.  Then knowing we couldn't do anything drastic until he graduated.
I really don't know if I have any big plans?
Get a back yard and a driveway for my kids?
Thats what I want in less than 18 months, but I hate putting time limits on things because then if they don't happen I'll be disappointed
Yeah, when I gave up my original five year plan, I pretty much gave up all five year plans.  It was so hard to decided to give up everything I had planned for Brent, I don't really want to do that again.  Because I know I pick the better option, and my five year plan would have been pathetic in comparison, but it was like ripping out a part of me.  So I don't like to plan, I like to wander around in the dark, until I hear the voice, then plan excessively and act as soon as possible and let my relatives all wonder if I'm thinking clearly. But actually there is a method I like better.  Let my husband plan excessively, let my husband plan more excessively, wander in the darkness, and say, wait for it, now this, right now, here. And then there we are.  Is that weird, is that too personal, too much?  I'm feeling all blog confused and fickled lately.
So the question is what are you big plans?
Have any?
I loved your comments last time, don't you want to share some more!

3 comments:

  1. Ours basically revolve around Jake finishing law school and I always have a deployment in the plan just in case
    If Jake was at the career stage of life I think I'd plan ahead more.

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  2. I had my whole life planned, pre-cancer. And everything pretty much had gone according to plan, pre-cancer. I guess I'm like your mom because I'm searching for a new plan. It's so weird to be without one.

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  3. Does it count if we have up to five years planned? Three years in Wisconsin. Two years in Ohio. Then ?????????

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