Sunday, July 29, 2012

Hair Cut

The last time my daughter had her hair cut was Christmas.  When the boys buzzed their hair in the beginning of the summer, she wanted hers buzzed off too, because her hair was "too beautiful".  She has begged for hair cut all summer.  She doesn't like washing her hair or getting it combed.  I did start using conditioner in her hair and that helped, but she still wanted a hair cut desperately.  Here is the result.
 We got lucky we just went down to our local cheap cuts, and I explained what I wanted and she said a bob?  I said no an A line.  Then she finished and luckily she did do an A-line and she asked what do you think, I said its really thick in the back middle.  So she thinned the back, and now it looks good. Nan said she was Rapunzel because she got her hair cut.
Isn't the back cute?
 Here is the before. I loved putting it in a pony tail or pig tails but she would pull it out within 20 minutes everytime, so I agreed it was time to cut it.


Here is my family and I when I was 35 weeks along.

 Here I am at 37 weeks. Today.  For a long time I thought my biggest pregnancy was my first.  Now I think this pregnancy and my first are pretty tied.
Here is my first pregnancy if you would like to compare, at probably 35 weeks. My face swelled more in that pregnancy though. Then again with the summer, my feet and hands are having swelling problems, this time around.
And here I am at about 35 weeks with my 2nd pregnancy.  I gained the least amount with my daughter, and with my two boys I have been comparable size.

Friday, July 27, 2012

Just for information

Just for your information, sure I'm whinny, but we are having the hottest summer on record since 1895.  Yeah, what are the odds, the hottest summer in 117 years and its the summer that I'm due to have a baby in August.

Women from Texas kept telling me at least you aren't in Texas, and I kept saying at least you have air conditioning. Ever since we got our mini van, I'm been grateful for the amazing a/c, also sometimes in the store I wonder whats worse, being here in a/c or home and hot.  Now after my cousin's post I realize how lucky I am.  I'm also EXTREMELY grateful for every moment the sun is behind the clouds because at 7,000 feet it makes a huge difference.  What does not make me so happy is my bizarre family.  Brent apparently doesn't feel heat, nor do his children.  My daughter sleeps in long john pajamas every night, when I try to convince her to wear something else, she tells me she will be cold.  My son refuses to open his bedroom window, which means I can't spend more than 5 minutes in his room.

Thursday, July 26, 2012

Two weeks

I am 37 weeks today, and I've most likely we have chosen to be induced at 39 weeks, because my doctor is gone at 40 weeks and school starts at 41 weeks. I honestly don't care about the doctor being out of town, it just seems like the right decision to have the baby at home and situated before my kids start on new adventures.  It seems right for the family.
Brent and I have discussed induction for a few months now, we have tried "the whole natural child birth thing" for two babies now, and spend hours about hours on pitocin for two babies, and end up getting an epidural and thinking why didn't we do this hours ago.  My recovery was great with Nan, after my pitocin and epidural, I then realized my body and mind were in battle.  I let my body win, we all have our different strengthens/skills in any aspect of life.  My body wins on being long and thin, not on natural child birth, and I've accepted that, life goes on, thankfully!
Long story short, this seems like a good decision for our family.  But holy smokes, that means I only have two weeks.  I'm been getting ready, but two weeks, isn't long.
I now have diapers, wipes and burp clothes on every floor of the house.  I have all the newborn and 0-3 month clothes washed, but not organized.
I have a carseat and a stroller. My mom brought out my finished baby quilt, but that is about it as far as ready. But he is not going to be needing a quilt for at least a FEW weeks. There is a bassinet with two extra sheets and a rocking chair in my room.
I am in the process of recovering (with fabric) the baby swing.  Which I think was a bad idea, I wouldn't recommend it.  Oh well, I'm going to finish because I'm not buying a new swing, and I don't want him in a pink swing.  I should have sold it three years ago like my husband wanted me to do.  
Plus I need to make his baby blanket. Plus I want to make 3 or four more burp clothes.  I think I can do that in two weeks.  That is doable to do list.  If I was awesome I would have some dinners in the freezers, but I'm not good a cooking now, so what makes me think I could make two dinners a night and freeze one.  
The induction starts in the evening, I'm hoping to clean my bathrooms before, but maybe the day before so I'm not too tired when I go into the hospital.
Plus I got my back to school shopping all done, and the kid dental appointments done.  All that is left is my 6 year olds well child visit on Saturday, yeah I'm 6 months behind.
All the supplies are bought for school except for these.... blah walmart didn't have them, so I have to go to the big city. If first grade mead composition notebooks were a decent price I would get them on amazon, but not at $8 a book, I need four for first grade.

By the way just because I schedule an induction don't mean I keep it, knowing me, I'll still be pregnant in four weeks.

OH! OH! I almost forgot the most important thing on my to do list.  Finish Nan's two baby books.  Two you may ask?  Yes, I already finished one.  My first born has three.  So, so must my second born.  We looked at them at family home evening, and I told my husband, the only reason I make these is so our children will feel important when a new baby comes and takes over their lives.  He quizzically asked, that is the reason?  I firmly replied yes.  

Wednesday, July 25, 2012

Ice Cream and a Bomb

A few weeks ago my mom was in town, and we (she, me and my 2 kids) went to one of the local attractions, to use my soon to expire living social deal.  Afterward I said lets go to Dairy Queen for lunch because I was craving a blizzard. The closest Dairy Queen to my house is a half an hour a way, so I would never go there to eat just because. Before we went I told my mom, its in the ghetto, well not really, but the only thing around is industrial parks, and there are only 6 tables total, but your dairy queen is like the worst in the world, so it will be fine.  
After we were all done eating our lunch except for slow poke McGee, we noticed a cop talking to one of the employees.  Long story short, some called in a bomb threat on a pick-up truck and if you were parked on the west side of the restaurant you were not allowed to leave.  They locked the door to that side, but the weird thing was, people kept coming in the other door and leaving.  Luckily slow poke McGee, is as slow as all get out, so the kids ate their ice cream cones, while we waited and waited and waited.

As my mom said if we weren't locked in we would have hurried up McGee, but since we were locked, we let him take is merrily sweet time. For once he got to spend 2 hours consuming only a hot dog, soda and ice cream cone.  I looked up the news report on my mom's iphone. The news online only told us that two sanitation guys picked up what they thought was garbage, and put in the back of their truck. A former military guy at their next stop recognized it as a bomb and called 911. 
I go to church with a guy on the swat team, and am friends with his wife. I wanted to call and ask what was the hold up.  I was ready to go.  Eventually a cop moved my car for us and we drove away.
So then my husband got the scope from the swat guy at church. A man had made a propane bomb and was trying to set it off with his stopwatch watch, but had been trying for over an hour with no avail.  He said that guy would have never been able to set it off.  He seemed very nonchalant about the whole thing. While I thought if they though there was a bomb, shouldn't have have calmly evacuated us from the Dairy Queen, and had us drive off almost immediately instead of locking us in?  As my husband said, what the Oklahoma City Bombing taught us, is a building will crumble like cardboard.
Anyway, that is my bomb story that I've been meaning to post for three weeks.  Since this took so long, I probably will never get around to post anything about the family reunion we hosted.


I didn't know if I wanted my baby to drop or not.  A relief from the back pain and bruised ribs sounded nice, but really what about the baby on my bladder?  Well just like anything in pregnancy I don't get to pick what happens.  He decided to drop anyway, I'm so tall and thin, EVERYONE can tell he dropped.  I walked into church on sunday and one girl said, "Lesli when are you having that baby?" "August" "Oh, because he looks low."
Well the best part of the baby dropping is a relief from the back pain.  I can eat dinner now, without pain.  For the previous two weeks I couldn't even lay on my side without pain, I spend a lot of time on my hands and knees on the floor, it was the only way I wasn't in pain.  Sure my back still does hurt, and sure he does still kick my ribs, but overall its no where near as painful.  A week ago I didn't know if I could go four more weeks, now I think, yes, I'll survive, I'm in so much less pain. I'd like to believe I'm a more pregnant woman now.  But my poor husband still has to listen to my freak outs over hot flashes, how nausea I am, and my annoying reflux.

Tuesday, July 24, 2012

Thumb Sucking

Remember all the drama of deciding whether to listen to the dentist or not about fighting with my daughter about sucking her thumb?
Well so I decided to switch dentists at the practice we went to. We went today.  We talked about cross-bites, and her sucking her thumb, and why she has a cross bite from sucking her thumb.  Then the dentist said we normally don't worry about cross bites until they are 7 or 8.  That was it end of story.  No ridiculous, try to get your three year old to stop sucking her thumb even though you are having a baby in a month saga.  It was great, I'm so glad I switched.
I was also really proud of my hyper sensitive daughter, she let them clean her teeth!  Wahoo.

Thursday, July 19, 2012

Back to School Shopping

I took my kids back to school clothes shopping.  Kohls seemed to have a good sale going, so I figured one more thing to cross off the list before baby comes.  Remember his due date is 5 days before school starts, and both my children are starting school this year.  Also remember the three year old is starting preschool four days a week for speech.  I had no plans of buying a lot of stuff, just a few things.  They both got three shirts, and J got a lunch box.  (In my mind it will be easier to buy winter clothes, when fall hits, and I don't want to yell at them all the time, because I'm so uncomfortable.)
But none of this is the point of the post.  I found it funny to shop with my son, I don't often take him shopping, I usually just pick something up on clearance for him, or he wears hand me downs.  My son has absolutely no interest in shirts that have athletic team sport graphics.  You know shirts that have baseballs, footballs, none of the that.  What he does like is skater shirts.  He picked out two tony hawk shirts, and an angry bird shirt.  This makes complete sense, but I still found it funny.  Although my husband does play team sports like basketball on a tuesday night, my son has never seen him play team sports other than kicking the soccer ball in the backyard.  All he has seen my husband do is skateboard.  So of course that is what he would want to wear skater shirts.  This year he seemed to have an affinity for lighting bolts, and skulls.
While my daughter liked monkeys and princess crowns.

Saturday, July 7, 2012

Getting Ready

Well it seems we are finally getting ready for this baby.  We got our mini van last night.  I put the bassinet in our room, today.  A friend gave it to me, and I'm pretty excited, I've never had a bassinet before. I mostly just put the bassinet in our room, because I don't have anywhere else to put it.  I still have no diapers, and I need to organize the baby clothes. But I'll get the diapers after I organize the clothes, so I have space for them.  Other than that, I think I might be close to ready for the baby to come.
I'm grateful this is my third, so now I know don't read or get the free subscriptions to any baby magazines, since they only turn you into a loony bin. I honestly don't care about any of the reading material, or the suggest baby lists.  I'm pretty sure I don't need outlet covers for a few months, so why worry.  I have other kids to care for.
When I was first pregnant I was sort of sad I didn't have a room to decorate for the baby, I've never had a nursery, the only time we had an extra room was with my first, and we didn't have money for a nursery.  We had a handme down dresser, a crib, and a used rocking chair.  But now I'm kind of grateful I'll never have a nursery, its nice to know I don't have to fill up the space with things we'll only use for a few months at a time.  For this baby, I have the same crib as for the first, no dresser, and a used rocking chair.  Somethings never change I guess.  :)
That being said, here is my list of what I need for a baby.

  • Clothes-- that would be a whole different post, and a lot is subject to season, location, size of baby, etc
  • Large thin blankets. receiving blankets from the store are pretty useless they are too small. Not too large just the size of baby quilts, the great thing is lots of people realized this, and now sell them online
  • Lots of burp cloths
  • diapers, wipes, bum cream
  • a swing (we've never had an infant bouncer, but I do have this infant/toddler rocker for the basement, where the swing will be in our living room)
  • a crib, mattress, and maybe three sheets, I've never had the bumper set, and everything that comes is that $100+ bag, but if I find a cute dust ruffle for the crib on sale I do buy it.
  • a bassinet, or port crib, something for my bedroom
  • rocking chair for me to sit in
  • car seat, the adjustable strap that comes out by their feet is worth the extra cost (see this one has a strap hanging down by the bottom, this one doesn't)
  • basket to put diapers wipes and burp clothes on every floor of our house, never had a changing table
  • once they are old enough to hold themselves up, walkers are super useful, I think, but other than that and a swing I don't buy and large baby toys.  I guess a execersaucer is safer, but my kids never have enjoyed those as much.
  • This time we will need GOOD baby gates, but we have never used them before, nor do we need them for a few months
  • I don't use a baby bathtub, I just clean out my bathroom sink and wash them in that, then once they are too big for that, I find a plastic dish tub at walmart way more useful then a baby bath tub, I don't think baby bathtubs put the kid in enough water to actually clean them.  Plus they take up a ton of space to store.  I do use baby washcloths, hooded towels, and baby soap.
  • I will also say I store their clothes in a sweater box, that hangs in a closet until they are about 12-18 months old, eventually their clothes take up to much room, and it doesn't fit anymore.
  • I guess I'll get some pacifiers, but my kids have always hated them, favoring their hands
  • I nurse so I don't have to worry about bottles at first, but I getting a pump is useful, at least more comfortable plus all the stuff for nursing. 
A lot of baby stuff out there, I have never found a use in, and then gotten rid of.
Oh and a diaper bag, I don't worry about that, I just use the free one from the hospital.  But I do like a changing pad, for public.  Although my motto is when in doubt change them in the car instead of a public restroom, unless its inconvenient.
Oh and we have never had a the space for a big bulky high chair, we just use the boosters. But we don't even pull that out for the first couple of months of mush.  I don't know why babies need to be a lazy boy type chair for eating.  Plus the booster seat is so much easier to clean, especially because my chair has no seams in it for crumbs.

Friday, July 6, 2012

Slightly reading

I've been reading because its hot, and its hard to do my chores, like laundry, cleaning, dishes while outside, but over all, I haven't had a great interest in reading lately.  Then again I don't interest in doing much.

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My rating: 3 of 5 stars
I'm not quite sure what I think of this book.  My friend recommended this book, and I guess I didn't read the title, because I didn't realize it would be so sad.  Sorrow is in the title though, so I guess the disappointment after disappointment in Rose's life should have been expected.  Even though it was gruesome to think about, and sad to read, I found this history part of this book very fascinating, since it takes place during the French Revolution. From what I've read, the author does a good job of following history, the fiction part was the details of lives, and conversations.  But I'm not French Revolution historian so what do I know. I spent the whole book wondering how Rose turns into Josephine Bonaparte, and so now I'm interested to see how the Bonapartes rise in power and fame, so I am planning to read the second book, even though I found this one sad.
By the way, this book is not for younger audiences, the author does not shy away from the promiscuity of the time.  

The Hunger Games (The Hunger Games, #1)The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I put off reading this book because it was so popular. After a while I decided I wanted to be lazy and wait until after I saw the movie so I wouldn't have to use my imagination.  After watching the movie, I wanted to know what happened in the next two books.  This was a quick read, and it was enjoyable for the day or two it lasted.  I didn't think it wasn't as violent as everyone said it was, it was about the lightest dystopian literature I've read, but it was entertaining. I was glad in the book that Peeta wasn't as pansy-ish as he was in the movie.  He was a much better character in the book.

My rating: 3 of 5 stars
It took me a day or two to get into the plot, but then I enjoyed the book. Probably more than book two, but definitely less than book 1.  Ah, the way of series. Back to the book, I felt like the beginning was slow moving.  Then I was surprised at how quickly the authors tied up so many loose ends so quickly in the end. Considering the series started out as single people looking for matrimony, I thought the book would have been better with more about each couples' relationship.  But I did like the letters back and forth between James and Thomas. Although they definitely lacked a separate voice from their wives.  Maybe that is what the book was missing more James and Thomas.  They were very prevalent during the first book, pretty non- existent(as far as character voice) in the second, and made a slight revival in this book. I could have handled more. Still I enjoyed the story, and I enjoyed Cecy and Kate as mothers.

My rating: 3 of 5 stars
I didn't like this book as much as book 1, but still it was an entertaining read. If you like book 1, might as well take a chance on book 2.  Then again, I can't think of a single series that book 2 is as good as book 1.  I enjoyed the read, less channeling of Austen society, more channeling of magic, history, and antiquities.

Confessions of an Economic Hit Man.

Confessions of an Economic Hit ManConfessions of an Economic Hit Man by John Perkins
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I checked out Confessions of an Economic Hit Man by John Perkins from the library for my husband and then it read it myself. Now you may be wondering what an Economic Hit Man is?  He worked for a private company to go into countries to build up infrastructure that then burdens the country with massive debt to the World Bank that the country will never be able to pay back.  Thus the bankers backing the World Bank get richer.  The infrastructure is of course built by American companies.   It didn't say that much new ideas, I already knew our country stopped being a republic and started being an empire.  I also knew that even we claimed to be "isolationists" we only meant in other hemispheres.  As a government we have been trying to rule Central and South America for more than a century, unlike the rest of the world, which has happened since the World Wars.  But I found this book interesting because it was Perkins' life story, its what he experienced working for the empire builders.  Instead of some book written by a guy who "uncovered a conspiracy."  At the same time it was life story, so sometimes, I scanned thinking, move along move along, this doesn't really have anything to do with anything, other than his lifetime of guilt.  The book is an example of why my PolSci professors told me and my other classmates to read international newspapers.  We in the United States live in a dream world with dream headlines, often times the news of world events isn't even reported here.

Here are a few quotes from the book I found interesting.  In the early 70s Perkins was in Indonesia, and he unlike most of his co-workers liked to mingle with locals.  While he was in Indonesia for months, he befriended some college age students, they told him that Communism wasn't the real threat, it would go away, the real war would be inbetween Christians and Muslims.  I was very surprised to read this passage that took place in the early 70s, more than a decade before the Berlin wall fell.
"The Soviet Union currently stands in its way, but the Soviet will not endure.  ...They have no religion, no faith, no substance behind their ideology. History demonstrates that faith -- soul, a belief in higher powers -- is essential.  We Muslims have it.  We have it more than anyone else in the world, even more than the Christians. So we wait. We grow strong." p 46 in 1970s

It makes me sad to think for the most part the republic is dead, and has been replaced by an empire, but this is nothing new or crazy.  We use to talk about where America was trying to head during its empire phase of its life cycle.
"... the distinction between the old American republic and the new global empire.  The republic offered hope to the world.  Its foundation was moral and philosophical rather than materialistic.  It was based on concepts of equality and justice for all. ... The global empire, on the other hand, is the republic's nemesis.  It is self-centered, self serving, greedy and materialist, a system based on mercantilism. 127-8

This next quote was sort of my own personal vendetta.  It drives me crazy when people hail Ronald Reagan as the savior of conservatism.  I've heard it from different groups that fall inside the Conservative umbrella, and all I have ever been able to see is he was one of the first to bring in Neo-Conservatism, as in lets become a world powerful empire.
"Reagan, on the other hand, was most definitely a global empire builder, a servant of the corporatocracy.  At the time of his election, I found it fitting that he was a Hollywood actor, a man who had followed orders passed down from moguls, who knew how to take direction.  That would be his signature.  he would cater to the men who shuttled back and forth from corporate CEO offices to bank boards and into the halls of government.  He would serve the men who appeared to serve him but who in fact ran the government -- men like Vice President George H. W. Bush, Secretary of State George Schultz, Secretary of Defense Caspar Weinberger, Richard Cheney, Richard Helms, and Robert McNamara.  He would advocate what those men wanted: an America that controlled the world and all its resources, a worth that answered to the commands of that America, a U.S. military that would enforce the rules as they were written by America, and international trade and bank system that supported America as CEO of the global empire.  p. 155

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Thursday, July 5, 2012

6 weeks

I am 34 weeks along, which means only have 6 weeks left.  For some reason in my mind, this is the point to strive for.  There is no end in sight for months and months, then at 6 weeks you can see the end. Its the beginning of the end.

Am I ready?  Not in the slightest, I don't even have a diaper.

Although some might find this shocking, part of me keeps wondering what is worse a newborn or pregnancy.  I'm excited to have another member in my family, but really a newborn, they are so needy, and I'm so tired.  Brent and I aren't really newborn people.  

This all being said, hooray, its a red letter day.  Only 6 weeks left!

Fourth Parade

My kids put on their own parade since ours was thankfully canceled.  It was very cute, but obviously I'm bias. (I think my camera sucks.)
 The fire as of yesterday was 90% contained. Hooray, although it will burn for another few weeks, even once they reach 100% containment.  The weather has mostly returned back to normal, it seems like we are staying normal with averages of the past instead of setting records.  The weather yesterday was much more mild then it was last fourth. (Although last night seemed to be the hottest night of my life, I was burning up I struggled sleeping. Even though the day was nice, for summer.)
It was a nice calm fourth, which was super nice.  Brent invited some people over, so there were 5 adults and 4 kids, for our BBQ.  Ping Pong was played, lots of soda was consumed.  After everyone left I realized my kids still hadn't done their parade so I got out the musical instruments.  Then we cleaned up, bathed the kids, got in our jammies, and watched fireworks on TV. Nan went to bed at 9:30, when she declared she was so tired!  The rest of us went straight to bed at 10, after the credits started on TV, it was so nice, no traffic or anything.  Perfect for this pregnant lady.

Tuesday, July 3, 2012

Independence Day Family Home Evening

I asked my husband to give a family home evening lesson on why we celebrate the fourth of July.  He kind of ignored me, when I brought it up again, I quickly realized I was the historian out of the couple, so why was I asking him. I also figured there had to be about 15 Family Home Evening Lessons on Independence day.  
So to google I went, I was pretty disappointed.  There was a bunch about the Title of Liberty, and what a flag can teach us, there was one or two on the Constitution, but nothing about July 4, 1776 and the Declaration of Independence. PEOPLE, YOU DO REALIZE there is two different documents written in completely different years, with two different purposes, RIGHT?!!
In my search the most useful things I found were two movie clips from the History Channel, first on the Declaration of Independence and second the History of the Fourth of July.  But I knew my daughter would gain absolutely nothing about anything from the movies, so I figured I'd make my own lesson. Now I know there are historical ambiguities I'm missing here, but I'm teaching a lesson to a 6 and 3 year old.  I know I'm missing some of the finer points on why things happened.
  Here are the pictures I used with absolutely no thought for copyright or source. 
I started off, with fireworks, because I knew it would impress my 6 year, and asked him why we celebrate the fourth of July?
He said uhh.... because of America.  I figured a good answer for a 6 year old.
Then I explained long time ago, we weren't our own country, we were 13 colonies apart of England. 
Instead of having our government we have now, we had a king, named King George.
Do you think he was nice?  Poor Nan, she she being obsessed with princess smiled and said yes.  J aptly observed no, or you wouldn't have asked. I told them, he started to tax them a lot and take their money, and the people living in the 13 Colonies didn't like giving their money to the king.
Right then my husband, pipped in, and asked J, what if every time you played with your Legos you had to give me some, and I would never give them back to do you.  Would you like that?  He of course said no, then my husband explained that is what the king was doing with their money in taxes.
So some of the people got together to discuss what to do with about this dislike of the King.

And then they wrote about Declaration of Independence. 

Which meant they were saying they were free from England and the King, which started the revolutionary war.  My husband did a vocabulary lesson, on what Declaration and Independence mean, because vocabulary for children is more his forte, than mine.

We talked about the Redcoats fighting against the Americans, and how the Americans had less men and food, and shouldn't have won, but we did win.
Then on the spur I went into Freedom of Religion and Joseph Smith, and we were done.  
Did my three year old get any of that.  Probably not, that's ok, my 6 year old now knows there is more purpose to the Fourth of July than just fireworks and parades.  
I also showed him this picture of Betsy Ross, and explained the stars and stripes.
And a picture of Yankee Doodle.
Then my husband looked at me funny when I finished the end of the song with, "mind the music and the steps and with the girls be handy." But they are in the lyrics.  My daughter really loved that part of the lesson, and we had to sing it a couple of times.
I finished off my lesson with a picture of more fireworks.

Monday, July 2, 2012

Dry Fourth

As you know my state is burning up.  Luckily they are making progress on the fire.  The east side of my town is no longer on pre-evacuation and the fire is 55% contained.  Hooray! There is still a lot of work to do, the state is still dry and hot, and it costs a lot of money to fight fires.  So, there is no fireworks this year.  I didn't think there would but for the sake of my son, I looked up if anyone near by was having fireworks, I found at least 10 shows canceled.  Not to mention the parade in our town is canceled.  I'm really ok with all this, I'm uncomfortable at home, I could only imagine the parade this year, based on lasts year.  Bleh.  But to a six year old this is all so sad.  So I'm thinking in my brain what would make the day special for him.  He asked isn't there anywhere we can do/see fireworks?  I said on tv, that night.  He seemed to perk up at that.  I also saw some cute treats people made for the fourth of july on pinterest. Like life saver firecrackers and these buckets. Maybe I'll stop by the store without them, and do something special, since there is no parade.  Although he is planning to have his own parade with his sister.  We area also having a BBQ, but all his friends are on vacation so.. well not all, but you know.