For the first few years of marriage/motherhood I felt like I was often playing house. I was having fun but I kept expecting the "adults/parents" to come home and send me and my best friend Brent home. They never did, I was the one in charge, the one that was suppose to call the shots. But seriously I was just playing house. Weren't all my fancy wedding presents that I loved using, just toys bought for Christmas? Or maybe they belonged to someone else that was maybe napping for something, that I would use to pretend with when they weren't looking. (I remember as a child trying on my mom's jewelry when she wasn't in the room, or when she was.)
One day I was visiting my cousin and her family in Vegas, and she asked me if I ever felt like I was playing house? Yes!, I was so relieved to know some one else felt the same way.
A few months ago, something reminded me of that time. But oddly enough the feeling went away years ago. Probably sometime during my second pregnancy, after four years of marriage. Yeah, reality has definitely set in, if nothing else during the colic of my second. This is my life, I love it, sometimes I feel like its semi-charmed, other times its harder than I expected, but its definitely mine, no one is going walk in and pay me and send me home. Thank goodness. No one is going to knock on my plastic door and tell me to clean up for dinner. I'm the one in charge whether I like it or not.