Tonight, I went to a wedding reception with my 6 year old, 3 year old, and 1 year old. No husband, he is high adventuring up, but I can't complain he took my 9 year old. My 6 year old is thriving being the oldest.
Back to the wedding. I was going to give the bride money no matter what, so I wanted my free cupcakes. Brent would have been so proud of me, I only ate two. I figured I'd rather keep my children contained at the reception then miss the action at home.
When we walked in, I wanted to prostrate myself on the floor like a child who doesn't want go into just one more store. I thought I can't do this in 20 years. It looked so lovely!
It didn't help that my bishop stopped to say to hi to me, while I tried to keep my kids from covering everything in frosting. He told him you'll be here before you know it, pointing to my daughter. Seriously I wanted to cry!
I said, oh, don't I know it, I'm worried.
Then I had a moment of clarity when I was putting an inch of peach lemonade in three different cups. Weddings are fads, all I need some good friends and do the same reception as everyone else that year.
*Insert more crying* I'm so bad at making good friends what if I don't have any when my kids get married. Best case scenario, my boys all marry girls who's parents live within an hour of us, and I have to help but not put on a wedding reception. Worst case scenario I have to put on ones for my boys too, because they will marry girls from other states. Five out 7 spouses among my siblings married people who graduated high school in Utah. Which is funny because not of all of them met their spouses in Utah. We are so Mormon. Everyone in my graduating class from High School was right. :/ But you know what that means all the spouse, all 7 of them married people who grew up in states other than then ones they grew up in. Its inevitable that some of my kids will married kids from other places. Our roots aren't that strong. Brent was not raised around his grandparents, I'm third generation military (well not exactly because Brent isn't military, but two of my brothers! I count them!) Which is what I want for my kids, freedom. My biggest fear in staying in Colorado too long is my children won't feel like they can move any where in the world they want. I never want them to feel like they have to stay in a place, because its comfortable, or because they have friends there, or because that's where their family is.
By the way I would rather put on wedding receptions for my children than not. But its just so much work for a couple of hours!