Thursday, June 23, 2011


My husband moved in with on Saturday.  It was all very trilling.  I went grocery shopping at 7:30 am we would have something to eat and so I wouldn't miss his probable early arrival. I figured after that I would clean the kitchen and vacuum the house.  Imagine my surprise when at 9 am while I still unpacking groceries I heard a car in my garage.  I found a tired look husband standing my doorway, he had started driving at 4.  I was ecstatic. My daughter was equally excited to find have daddy get her from her crib.  My son.. well I'm sure he was excited but he is pretty sullen, and you never can tell from his expressions.  Needless to say, I was glad I cleaned my room at 11 pm instead of assuming I could get it done in the morning, I really wasn't expected him before noon.
So the children and I have lived here for two months, my husband spent three weeks getting us moved and situated before he returned to school, he was gone for 5 weeks minus the 6 days he flew in to see us. I now a lot of people here for only living here for two months, so now people keep asking is he home?  Where is he what does he look like.  I told someone the other day, here he is he isn't imaginary.  Everyone here has been so helpful and supportive while he was gone.  At first I thought why are the making a big deal out of me?  This is military country people are use to spouses being gone for 6-12 months not, 5 weeks.  Then I realized, oh that is why, they realize how difficult life can get.

I haven't blogged much, because well, it seemed weird to blog about life without a husband. The kids got to the point that my five year old wanted to talk on the phone with his dad, but yet didn't seem to notice if he didn't talk to him for three or four days.  My daughter still daily asked "where daddy go"  but she no longer seemed to expect an answer.  She was just as happy to have fake conversations on her fake phone with  dad as to have real conversations on my phone.  In fact if she had a fake conversation that day she wouldn't talk that night.  Life became normal, and I now understand how single parenthood works.  I would hardly say 5 weeks is as hard, but always wondered how anyone could do it?  But now I understand like anything else, you just wake up and do it, and each day repeat.  Although I hardly think it was an ideal situation, I wasn't able to meet their needs like normal, and I also was being a poor substitute for a dad.  Brent wasn't around much during school, it was it was amazing how much he was around in comparison to living in a different state.  Anyway, we are all back together, the daily occurrences are maybe not so personal, so maybe I'll blog more.
Life is weird all together.  Last night we were out to dinner, when my daughter decided to take a nap on the floor, my husband took care of it, it was like some out of body experience. I really don't think I could describe how weightless I felt to realize I didn't have to wrestle my children 24 hours a day anymore. But yet life is hardly a vacation, my husband goes to work every morning, and I still have to grocery shop with both kids.  Its so miserable to shop with both of them.  My daughter threw a wicked fit today, to the point that everyone, I mean everyone even from aisles away were looking at us, I finally wrestled her into the basket and strapped her in, surprisingly she calmed down within 5 or so minutes.  I thought she was going to fight and scream the whole trip.  Yes, I still wrestle, but its nice to know in the evenings I have back up.  But honestly having back the second parent for my two parent household is really not the reasons I'm glad Brent is back.  I missed my bestfriend more than I missed the other parent.  If that makes sense.