Monday, October 26, 2015


A few months ago my husband got invited to go Canyoneering. I told him he could only go if his brother went. I didn't feel the need for him to scratch his outdoor itch, but I didn't mind him having brother bonding.

The night before he left I was close to a melt down. The last time he had gone anywhere for pleasure without me was pretty much the worst 10 days of my life. Normally I'm a fairly accommodating wife and my husband has his fair share of fun. But its been a rough while in my life lately. When I was on the verge of tears, I asked what am I going to do without you? (Physically I've felt fairly run down for the past few weeks, which isn't helping my mental health.)

He said you are going to take your medicine three times a day and be a super mom. You are always a super mom when I'm gone, but then you are going to fall to pieces when I get home and that is ok, because I'll be back by then to pick up everything.

Bizarrely enough that was enough for me.

I then asked, so you'll carve pumpkins with the kids for me when you get home and I don't have to be there if I don't want to be? I can leave or hide, if I'm not up to it?

He said of course.

I then wondered why I hate carving pumpkins so much. And we remembered he has gone on a lot of October business trips. My rule has always been he can't travel over Halloween, so he usually shows up the day of, and I'm carving pumpkins before we walk out the door for Trunk or Treat. The only thing I hate more than carving pumpkins is moldy pumpkins so we always carve less than 6 days in advance.

Yeah, I hate carving pumpkins, I'm not sure I'll ever go back to liking it.

I want this...

Overall I'm too nice of a mom. If we were only carving one I could handle that, but I hate carving multiples.

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