Monday, August 13, 2012

A thought and a story

First a thought, I feel like I'm bombarded by the thought, "what would I do if I could achieve anything, start today" or if you don't strive for your highest dreams, you are wasting life.  I think that is completely wrong for my stage of life. I have lofty dreams and aspiration, I have things I want to achieve, but if I focus on them then I feel like I'm wasting my days.  But I'm doing the exact opposite of wasting my days, taking care of three small children is no waste.  I have dreams of master's degree or two, or a dream career, or even fulfilling my husband's dream of traveling the world.  But let me assure you I take no steps toward any of those dreams each day.  So don't mind me if I don't ever think about my dreams for my personal life are, because if I focus on that, then I'll feel like a failure providing for the needs of my children, and I'm pretty sure that is actually the most important task in life.  I've realized sometimes being content with where you are, is more important than dreams of the future.  If I spend my days dream of the future, I'm pretty sure I'm going to look back one day and realized I missed the past.

That was a long thought, now a story.  When we were house shopping, what I wanted more than anything was two living rooms. If the house only had one living area, I crossed it off the list.  This house just barely fit the bill, we have a main living room, on the main floor, and our tv/playroom in the basement.  In the beginning I wasn't going to have toys in the living room.  It was going to be a nice well put together room, and was always ready for company.  Then I gave up on that, I realized once again there was more important things in life. I realized there would be decades and decades of my life without toys in my living room, I might as well revel in the decade and half I have of children in a make believe world of toys talking. And enjoy it while it lasts that my children want to spend time with me.
 I used to get overwhelmed when my oldest was a baby and we were in college.  I would look at our living room, strewn in textbooks, homework, newspapers, and baby toys.  Realizing that I was going straight from textbooks and homework to toys, and then I would be back at textbooks and backpacks, would there ever be a break from our clutter? President Monson assured me one day there would be, and one day I would miss it. So yes, if you visit our house unannounced, you'll probably see toys and coloring pages from school or church all over my living room, and I'm ok with this. This all being said, there is a never a time in life I have to revel in dirty socks on the floor.  I constant tell my family members, pick up your socks take them to the laundry room.  And you know what I think it might be working, I think somedays I see my 6 year old socks in there, without being told.
On a side note, I'm excited for September, I'm excited to be able to clean my house again.  To get rid of the massive amount of clutter that has collected in the kitchen and bedrooms.  For some reason during the summer with this pregnancy I just could not keep on top of things.  Imagine that....

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