The talks in Sacrament Meeting were on Prayer. They were good, I appreciated listening to them. They were full of good reminders.
I realized Saturday morning I should pray to have patience at bath and bed time, maybe that will help the spirit in the home on Sunday morning.
Then after my nap and late dinner tonight, I realized I should also pray to have patience after church. Even though I have a testimony of the doctrine and feel edified while listening to the talks and lessons, I'm done after church. I have nothing left to share or give, so I'm often grumpy mommy on Sunday night. It is often discussed as a family because I have to apologize so much Sunday evening. So apparently I need to pray Sunday morning to help my energy levels in the afternoon.
I actually have made great progress on Sundays, I no longer have to hid in my room afternoon, I can make Sunday dinner again, although most Sundays I just help. I also am capable of talking to my children on Sunday. Progress, baby steps.
I can also sit next to my children on the pew, and say hi to people in the halls. I also am capable of asking people how they are doing and I can complement a family on their new baby.
Truly progress over the years.
I'm usually not embarrassed to talk about depression, but those are some embarrassing things to admit. It reminded me of this quote:
(I don't know what this came from, it was on pinterest with no citation.)
But as a reminder Prayer should book end your days. Starting in the morning with a plea to help you with what you can not do alone. And end the day with gratitude for all the times you were helped and admittance of all the times you still need help. Asking forgiveness for your inadequacies.
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