Wavering

My interest/faith/ everything else in Colombia was wavering. I thought maybe its not suppose to happen, maybe what was suppose to happen was to dream about it. Brent understands the business part of it better than me so he doesn't lose hope as easily, but still, I was wavering.

Then the other day we went out on some errands together without our kids. (grandma and grandpa are visiting.) On the car ride home Brent said some things about a long off future, about a slight possibility, about a maybe in our path one day idea. He/we use to talk about this a lot when we were younger but as mortgage, kids, schooling, scouting, bill paying, working, pregnancies, have pilled up, that vision has been distanced and faded. But he brought it up again, and it was a flash back to driving on 1-15 in Northern Utah farm country at night. I could see that possibility. I could see a lot little seemingless decisions we make in our life and how they could lead to that path.

I decided to not give up hope on Colombia.

Will it happen? Who knows?

Are we suppose to go down this path whether it happens or not? Yes

Eventually, I do not know when, but eventually Brent and I will finally live abroad. We have been planning and dream this since before my daughter was born. Each time the plans gets closer. One day.

This is not just a Brent and me plan. I wondered if I should date him, I wondered if I should marry him. I wanted to live abroad, how could I do that with a family?

Now I wonder how couldn't I do that with a family?

And now to finish off, I'll end with what I put on FB a few weeks ago,
Does the world call to you?
Everytime I hear of someone moving, see someone's pictures of them living abroad or traveling aboard, the pied piper's music gets louder in my ear. I need an adventure. 
Thankfully I married my husband. He loves adventure.

When Brent told his parents about this plan for Colombia. His dad asked what does Lesli think. I told him about my answer in the conference talk. My life has been guided with this question for months, "if you continue to live as you are living, will the blessings promised in your patriarchal blessing be fulfilled?” Its so hard, we live a good comfortable life. The kids go to an excellent school. We live an the epitome of a "happy valley" Our small town is Lake Wobegon without the lake. Literally.

I often wonder why, why do I feel drawn down this path? Sure I want to live abroad, but that is no reason for crazy.
I don't know why I feel so drawn. But yet I do, like I said the pied piper calls me.