I love my husband

A miracle happened tonight-- well many. I finally cleaned the house after a week of it getting more and more trashed. (All that's left is to vacuum first thing tomorrow, before the kids get toys out). I would see it get worse and worse, messier and messier, but I just couldn't do it while my kids were awake, and I couldn't do it while they were asleep, finally I had a chance to sew or watch what I want to watch. But tonight, tonight was different. Tonight my husband was home, we cooked dinner together, we watched an hour of tv together, he is currently putting our eldest child to bed. Finally my paralysis was over. I was able to clean up my kids messes. I even threw away some happy meal toys that have long been forgotten about, its been four months since I've been able to throw away a forgotten toy. Its amazing what a little attention can do for my psyche. Maybe I can finally start decluttering, so we can start fitting into our apartment again. Lately I've had issues, I know we don't fit, but I emotionally can't bare to get rid of ANYTHING, I mean anything. Normally I'm fairly decent at dejunking. Not only have I not been able to get rid of stuff, I've been buying MORE stuff. Its been awful, I need to watch Confessions of a Shopaholic again, to remind myself, stuff will not fill voids in my life. Oh but tonight was different, tonight we were a two parent, two adult house, I wasn't out numbered. I was blessed.
I love this man. I'm so grateful for the amount of time we get to spend with him.

I just wish it was more...