Sunday, August 30, 2015

Sabbath

As I'm sure all you tens of readers know I'm LDS, or Mormon or in the words of the children's song, I belong to the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints.

If you have been to the same church lately, get LDS emails/tweets/FB posts/pinterest pins, or are even just friends with a practicing Mormon you probably know the Church headquarters is putting greater emphasis on keeping the Sabbath day Holy.


So I've been thinking about it lately, the last few weeks. What can we do in our home to keep the Sabbath day more holy? I've been thinking about it more than a few weeks, now that I'm over postpartum depression I can actually interact with my children on Sunday. So I keep wondering what am I doing to improve their Sabbaths?

Then today in our third hour of church we had a big meeting for everyone 12 years and up about keeping the Sabbath day holy. A lot of good things were shared. 
Like Elder Nelson talking about once he read Exodus 31:13 
Speak thou also unto the children of Israel, saying, Verily my sabbaths ye shall keep: for it is a sign between me and you throughout your generations; that ye may know that I am the Lord that doth sanctify you.
All the lists of everything you should and shouldn't go out the window because its all about what sign you are giving to your Father in Heaven.

Ezekiel 20:20 was also shared.
Speak thou also unto the children of Israel, saying, Verily my sabbaths ye shall keep: for it is a sign between me and you throughout your generations; that ye may know that I am the Lord that doth sanctify you.
I'm an obsessive note taker, I think that's the reason I blog for all 38 of you. So I took some brief notes on how to spiritual improve my family's Sabbath in very non-measurable terms. But as humans we are for whatever reason obsessed with lists, so I decided we shouldn't watch movies anymore on Sunday.

I'll tell you about my Sabbath, after church.
We ate lunch, I put the little ones down for naps.
My husband went home teaching.
Both my older kids wanted to watch a movie. I said can't we come up with a better way to keep the Sabbath day holy? They both said I guess. We read The Friend, my daughter colored a picture, my son read, and then I was so tired I wanted scream. When I wouldn't help my daughter play The Friend games online, I made her cry.

So I went to take a nap. It seemed like the best way to handle the situation. A few minutes later when my husband came home, they asked if they could watch a movie and he said yes. Which was 100% the right answer. I've been thinking about the days events.


  1. When I have a spiritually uplifting Church attendance its almost mandatory I take a nap. I get too overwhelmed otherwise. In fact some Sundays when I come up with too many ideas how to improve our lives my husband tells me to take a nap, and I crash in about 5 seconds. I feel like the Doctrine and Covenants teaches this concept.
  2. I'm a mom of small children I always need a nap.
  3. I don't want my children to hate the Sabbath, and saying no movies, might not be the best way to teach a love of the Sabbath if their little brothers and their mom is napping.
  4. I still don't allow any video games other then The Friend activities and xbox kinnect sports if their dad wants to play with them.
  5. Bizarrely enough I do not allow children's tv shows even though I allow a family friendly movie or documentary. But I don't allow annoying movies on Sunday
  6. I should take my own advice:
In the meeting lots of people shared a lot of great things, but it all just seemed like one more thing on the to do list. So I raised my hand and said After everything that has been shared, I think they are great ideas to do with our families, but sometimes all the feels like one more thing on a mom's to do list of her never ending to do list that lasts all week. I think its ok for a mom to do what my mom did. My father was usually gone for meetings on Sunday and she had a lot of children. Her goal was not to entertain her kids, but to make the Sabbath a delight for her. (The media screen said, "Sabbath- a delight" at the time). She did Sabbath activities with us but not the entire Sunday. Every sunday for part of the time she would read her scriptures in her room. We were allow to be in her room with her, but not make noise or talk to her. What I didn't say but I could have, and you know its ok if that scripture study includes "resting your eyes". Two women thanked me for my comment. Yes, its ok to always be tired Sisters.

(Every Sunday at dinner I remember talking with my father about we learned about in church. We discussed the gospel every Sunday, but that doesn't mean they entertained us the whole day. I'm sure we often complained that we couldn't do anything on Sunday, but I think more often we didn't even think about it because it was a non-issue in our house. It was what it was. Point being I spent a lot of Sundays watching a family friendly movie, and I'm no worse for the wear. So I'm ok with my kids watching a movie, but not as immediate activity, more as a ok, we've talked, we've read, I'm sleepy please don't bother me, if you think that is the best use of your time you are welcome to make your own choice.)

The comment that came directly after mine, I very much appreciated. He said, you know it doesn't matter how many Monolopy games you've played as a family on Sunday, how many lovely walks you take, if you aren't testifying to your children the importance of Sabbath in word and deed it doesn't matter what else you are doing. And I think that was a great follow up. Every single Sunday my parents took the opportunity to discuss the gospel with us. But that doesn't mean that sometimes we didn't run around, and that definitely doesn't mean we sat on the sofa all day long reading our Biblical verses.

So the moral of the story is:
What am I doing to improve my Sabbath and my family's?
What sign am I making to the Lord?

My number 1 goal is to clean and vacuum the living room Saturday afternoon. (Saturday is a Special Day, its the day we get ready for Sunday.) I hate having yucky carpet on Sunday afternoon. That is my goal as a family, the whole house doesn't need to be clean, but if my carpet is clean when I play Spot it as a family then I'm more likely to feel the spirit in 20 minutes after the tears that were caused by whatever stop. Yes, a clean carpet is the sign I want to send to my Lord. Its the sign of yes, I prepared to be spiritually filled today, give me the patience I need to love your children.

My other goal is to stop shopping on Amazon on Sunday. I always say, but I'm not making anyone work. But I recently saw in article about over worked employees in Amazon shipping factories. Other than not vacuuming on Sunday we actually do a pretty good job of preparing on Saturday. These are two small changes that wouldn't cause tears every Sunday. This are two small changes that I can make that show a change of heart.
 

Thursday, August 27, 2015

Five Years

I've been a ball of emotions lately.
I'm not sure if I'm enjoying my time home with only two toddlers. I'm not sure I want them to grow up. I know I don't have a choice. But other moments I think toddlers are the most exasperating creatures on earth, and I sure do love my children once they start kindergarten.
My oldest child practically cries if I try to hug him. He does not like physical affection from most of his family. I'll be honest I'm not sure I'm really loving having two toddlers at home, but I don't want them to grow up because then maybe they will never hug their mama again. They currently adore me, because they are at the age, where they come up and hug me out of the blue. The other day out of the blue, the three year old said Mama, I said yeah? He said, I love you. 
Toddlers are beyond exasperating but I'm not sure children ever love you as much as they do as a toddler.

I'm working on my photobook from 2011. I'm a little behind. I found these pictures, turns out my oldest use to willing touch me! I'm not a very touchy person so I almost get. I know as a teenager I put strict limits on my mom's affections. But I'm 100% not ready for my little boys to ditch me at 7. I'm hoping they don't. I keep seeing things from friends on FB who have 11 year olds saying one day this boy won't want to hug me good night.
Maybe there is hope.

Monday, August 24, 2015

Obedience

The other night I said to my husband, I haven't been being very obedient. 
He replied, "Oh really?"
I said yeah, in the beginning of the summer I decided to read the Gospels (Matthew, Mark, Luke and John) in reverse order. Its lately not cutting it, and I've felt inspired I need to move on to the Book of Mormon. But I really want to finish Matthew. I'm so close.
He started laughing, he told me, I was quite the rebel.

We sometimes have the silliest conversations as we are putting off scripture study and bedtime.

I also brought this idea of a couple scripture, again.
Brent said I got it, I know what our scripture should be.
He opened up the Book of Mormon where our bookmark was, and read Alma 1:1
Now it came to pass that in the first year of the reign of the judges over the people of Nephi, from this time forward, king Mosiah having gone the way of all the earth, having warred a good warfare, walking uprightly before God, leaving none to reign in his stead; nevertheless he had established laws, and they were acknowledged by the people; therefore they were obliged to abide by the laws which he had made.
Before he finished I was totally giggling. At 11 pm it totally fit for him as a dad, knowing the only kingdom he ever have is his family. 
He said its perfect. My response was for you as a dad yes. But not "us".

I said, give me the Book of Mormon, I'll find the one for me as a wife.
I slowly turned 1 Nephi 5, because I didn't know what chapter I was looking for. Who knew the story of Nephi moved so quickly?
8 And she spake, saying: Now I know of a surety that the Lord hath commanded my husband to flee into the wilderness; yea, and I also know of a surety that the Lord hath protected my sons, ... and given them power whereby they could accomplish the thing which the Lord hath commanded them. And after this manner of language did she speak.

To get the full effect of the conversation start at beginning of the chapter.
I also like verse 9 "And it came to pass that they did rejoice exceedingly, and did offer sacrifice and burnt offerings unto the Lord; and they gave thanks unto the God of Israel."

You know it only took me 5 years to forgive my husband and the Lord for Brent being a perpetual scout master. Where did such humility come from you may ask? Well not from me. I'm proud, just like the majority of humans. Two years or so ago, Brent's friend, the Young Men's President at the time gave him the book Trails to Testimony to read, Brent finally convinced me to read it.
*glass shatters*
Completely changed my perspective. So now I can say what Sariah said, except my husband doesn't flee into the wilderness he camps in the wilderness. But let's no forget an important part of the conversation. In verse 4, "And it had come to pass that my father spake unto her, saying: I know that I am a visionary man;" Lehi does acknowledge Sariah's complaints. And I have changed my perspective but I'm not perfect and still complain plenty!

Many times Brent has said Lehi has the best calling. He says, it would be so awesome for the Lord to tell him take his family backpacking for 6 years. Let's be honest, I would travel to the ends of the world to with my husband to make him happy, but that is not my dream at all!

Yesterday I finished Matthew, today I turned to the Pearl of Great Price not to the Book of Mormon, but not to be a rebel. 
I forgot how great the Book of Moses is:

16 Get thee hence, Satan; deceive me not; for God said unto me: Thou art after the similitude of mine Only Begotten.
17 And he also gave me commandments when he called unto me out of the burning bush, saying: Call upon God in the name of mine Only Begotten, and worship me.
18 And again Moses said: I will not cease to call upon God, I have other things to inquire of him: for his glory has been upon me, wherefore I can judge between him and thee. Depart hence, Satan.
19 And now, when Moses had said these words, Satan cried with a loud voice, and ranted upon the earth, and commanded, saying: I am the Only Begotten, worship me.
20 And it came to pass that Moses began to fear exceedingly; and as he began to fear, he saw the bitterness of hell. Nevertheless, calling upon God, he received strength, and he commanded, saying: Depart from me, Satan, for this one God only will I worship, which is the God of glory.
21 And now Satan began to tremble, and the earth shook; and Moses received strength, and called upon God, saying: In the name of the Only Begotten, depart hence, Satan.
Those are my emphasis I added. 

Sunday, August 23, 2015

profit and learning

The topic of the talks in church was scripture study. One of the speakers quoted, 1 Nephi 19:23.
for I did liken all scriptures unto us, that it might be for our profit and learning
He said as a small business owner, I might think of profit differently then you do. When I hear profit I think how much money are you making at the end of the day after all the work you've put in. When you think about scripture study that way, its different.
At the end of the day, tell you spouse, if you made a profit in your study, if you broke even or lost the time you put in to it.

I thought that was such an interesting though I haven't thought about before. Sometimes scripture study is a check on a list, but nothing really is gained other than obedience, other times its not a loss but not a lot is gained for various reasons, but other times it is truly a profit. I should try better to make my gospel study more of a profit.

Ascending

In third hour of church the lesson was on Linda K. Burton's talk, "We'll Ascend Together". For me its good to have reminders of the type of wife I want to be in twenty or thirty years, because then I have direction for today and tomorrow.
In the talk she quotes Robert D. Hales twice, which he is quoting a Quaker Proverb, which I guess  was penned by John Greenleaf Whittier.

Thee lift me, and I’ll lift thee, and we’ll ascend together
The foot notes take you to two different articles.
A conference talk by Elder Hales in 1999
and One written about Elder Hales

The one written about his life is quite interesting. This story especially stood out to me,

In 1975, Robert was in a board meeting when his secretary handed him a note saying that President Marion G. Romney was on the phone. Since it was very unusual for anyone to leave a board meeting, everyone was surprised when Robert left to take the phone call. At that time, President Romney asked Robert to serve as a mission president. Later the assignment came to preside over the England London Mission.
Shortly afterwards, Robert got another call from Salt Lake City—this time from President Spencer W. Kimball. He asked Robert if he would mind going to a different mission. Robert replied, “I don’t mind. Send me wherever you want to send me, President.” Then President Kimball asked, “Do you mind if we ask you to serve longer than three years?” Robert said, “Okay.” President Kimball then extended a lifelong call to him to serve as a General Authority.
“President Kimball told me he knew I was disappointed because I wanted to go out as a mission president,” says Elder Hales, “but he said, ‘Don’t worry about it; you will have many missions.’”
There have been many missionaries sent out from our ward while we've been here the last 4 years. I can't remember who, and maybe a few, but a missionary's mission was changed while he was in the MTC. I think that happened quite often when they first lowered the age. I remember a friend in the ward saying to my husband they (the Church leaders) don't understand how faith shaking it is when they move their call around. Here they are, they've gotten a letter signed by the prophet then they change it. I didn't response but I thought, really you don't think the Church leaders understand that can shake a 19 year old's faith? I'm positive they know it can, but yet isn't there many experiences in life that shake our faith. Isn't that our faith is built? So I liked hearing a story when it happened to a potential mission president, a general authority.

But in true blog post nature, I'm off topic.


Sunday, August 16, 2015

“The intertwining of people’s lives, often regarded as mere coincidence, is actually part of God’s ‘divine design.’”
Neal A. Maxwell

Saturday, August 15, 2015

Backpacking

One of the very important reasons I took a chance with Brent was because he liked backpacking. I had been backpacking a grand total of 2 times, before I met him.
But that makes me tough, you know?
He thought so.
He wanted a girl that wasn't afraid of roughin' it. He, his friends, and former scout leader were impressed I would try water skiing when I never had been before. I was surprised they found it so surprising. I do anything I want, (which isn't everything).
I tough it out better than most teenage boys when we go backpacking. I don't need an outhouse, pillow, change of clothes or running water. But I do need a massive amounts of clean drinking water. I can not move one more inch without constant water.
Plus the joke's on Brent I get altitude sickness. :p

So Brent, he likes to backpack. Indeed his mountain man-ness is one of my favorite things about him. But it has some huge downfalls.
Like High adventures. How many weeks I've missed of my marriage because he has been camping with the Boy Scouts?

Oh well, I still love him.

I've decided my little boys are old enough to be a better support him. So I'm been happy while he's gone. I had no melt downs. (I'll be honest last year when they were practicing for a dance festival, I encouraged my husband to not show up. They didn't need him, but I did.)

What changed you may ask? Well my mental health is healthy. That is important. Sometimes I'm supportive sometimes I can't handle being the only parent at home.

But last Sunday, I saw him on the stand with a boy that use to be one of his Deacons, he is now 16. After four years some of those young men will remember Brent their whole lives. I wondered if he is the type of leader that they will remember fondly or will he just be that one in the background of their youth that didn't make impact on them? I realized a lot of that has to do with how supportive I am as a spouse. So I've repented and started again. (He is FB friend with boys that were his deacons in Springville, who have now gone on their missions, come home and are now full-on adults. So weird! He always shares with me their big life news.)

I wasn't expecting a test of faith in less than 3 hours. But it came. After church he said to me, so we've decided to give up on ____ ___ for boating. Brother ______ said he could take us. Ok, I replied. He said the best weekend for everyone is a week from Saturday. I said ok. He asked, you do realize that is two Saturdays in a row. I replied, I know. He said the high adventure this week, and boating next. I said, I'm aware. I know, its ok.  He looked at me and wondered what happened to his wife.

Friday, August 14, 2015

Wedding update

Tonight, I went to a wedding reception with my 6 year old, 3 year old, and 1 year old. No husband, he is high adventuring up, but I can't complain he took my 9 year old. My 6 year old is thriving being the oldest.

Back to the wedding. I was going to give the bride money no matter what, so I wanted my free cupcakes. Brent would have been so proud of me, I only ate two. I figured I'd rather keep my children contained at the reception then miss the action at home.

When we walked in, I wanted to prostrate myself on the floor like a child who doesn't want go into just one more store. I thought I can't do this in 20 years. It looked so lovely!

It didn't help that my bishop stopped to say to hi to me, while I tried to keep my kids from covering everything in frosting. He told him you'll be here before you know it, pointing to my daughter. Seriously I wanted to cry!
I said, oh, don't I know it, I'm worried.

Then I had a moment of clarity when I was putting an inch of peach lemonade in three different cups. Weddings are fads, all I need some good friends and do the same reception as everyone else that year.

*Insert more crying* I'm so bad at making good friends what if I don't have any when my kids get married. Best case scenario, my boys all marry girls who's parents live within an hour of us, and I have to help but not put on a wedding reception. Worst case scenario I have to put on ones for my boys too, because they will marry girls from other states. Five out 7 spouses among my siblings married people who graduated high school in Utah. Which is funny because not of all of them met their spouses in Utah. We are so Mormon. Everyone in my graduating class from High School was right. :/ But you know what that means all the spouse, all 7 of them married people who grew up in states other than then ones they grew up in. Its inevitable that some of my kids will married kids from other places. Our roots aren't that strong. Brent was not raised around his grandparents, I'm third generation military (well not exactly because Brent isn't military, but two of my brothers! I count them!) Which is what I want for my kids, freedom. My biggest fear in staying in Colorado too long is my children won't feel like they can move any where in the world they want. I never want them to feel like they have to stay in a place, because its comfortable, or because they have friends there, or because that's where their family is.
By the way I would rather put on wedding receptions for my children than not. But its just so much work for a couple of hours!

My third child turned three.

My baby boy finally had a birthday in which is mom was not sick! Hooray. Last week during his birthday we also happened to be at grammy's. He had to have an H plate. My baby boy is the three year old. Get over it. Its just life because he is the momma's boy. Although I have to find a new name for him. I potty trained him this week, and he is officially a big boy now. He stays up with the big people instead of going to be with Ikey. (His idea definitely not mine.) Yes, Turbo really does call his little brother Ikey, that or Ike. I'm not sure I hear him say anything else.
He wanted another doggy cake. But I said no, mostly because I like to do different cakes every year. This year did not disappoint. Although he did need a dog on his cake. Which then ended up also meaning a bald eagle bigger than the cars needed to be on the cake. Its a 3 cake not an 8.  At least the bald eagle was only 2 inches tall unlike the 8 inch tall one he was trying to convince me to buy. Not only did I think it would swish the cake it was three times the price.
I modeled it off of cakes I'd seen online. My daughter said mine looked better. I asked because the secret ingredient was love? (because I assure you mine did not look better) She hugged me as she exclaimed yes. Then told Grammy about her cake when she turned 1.

The next day we went to the candy story with Grammy and Grandpa. It was a dream come true! The candy store was our experience birthday activity. I want to have experiences for birthdays even if they end up being more money than presents. So we don't have more and more stuff. He still got presents, because gosh golly he's only three. But I did spent less than $20 on them.
It was actually like the cutest candy store I've ever been in. 



Wedding Guilt

A year ago at Back to School night, I met the parents of one of my daughter's admires. With three brothers and a personality as tough as nails, she gets along great with boys even if she tells me she only wants friends who are girls. She spent 3/4 of the kindergarten school year at a table where she was the only girl. She complained once or twice to me. I causally mentioned it to the teacher at one point, she hadn't even realized because she said Nat was thriving at the table, and kept all those boys in shape. I had no doubt, she is ready to rule the world.
One of the little boys would come over for playdates. One day he told me, Nat is our best gal. Nick and I fight over her, we both want her to be only ours. HA HA HA Boys are so silly. Nat never even realized. She was confused why this little boy (the one who would come over) would poke her at circle time.

Anyway I've totally digressed. Back to back to school night. So I met Nick's parents. As we were talking they said they had three boys, and I said I had three boys and Nat. The mom's eyes lighted up and said oh she is so lucky. She will have the biggest wedding ever.
....
{Crickets} I had no idea what to say, I had never given one lick of thought to my daughter's wedding. Over the pursing weeks and months I might have borderline panicked thinking about this said huge wedding I had to plan.

Why I worried about something 20 years in the future is beyond me. Years ago when I lived by my grandma she told me I was wishing my children's lives away. Yes, I have a tendency to panic about the passing of time. Sometimes I wish I still lived by her so she could tell me that again.

But let me tell you I was a most unhelpful bride in planning my wedding. I had no interest in picking colors, even though I was eventually compelled to pick some. I'm not sure I had a theme at all, since both receptions had different ones. I told my mom I'd rather have a brand new vacuum then a wedding cake for the reception my parents put on. I had no bridesmaids. I cared about five things. My wedding dress, my husband's suit and tie, my shoes, my bouquet for pictures, and pictures. Oh and I was pretty picky about my invites. My father had always taught me you don't get married for a party, you get married because its the right time and the right person. I made no decisions about the reception my mom planned I gave her and her friends free rein. Thank goodness for those ladies, maybe I'll call them in 15-25 years. I gave my husband's family very little guidance much to their exasperation. I would like to say I was 20 and immature, but even if it was happening next month I probably still wouldn't care.

My sister got married before me, near the end of the wedding planning for her, my dad said I'll pay you to elope. I said deal. My mother scowled at us and rescinded the deal.

I wondered who would plan my daughter's wedding for me in 20 years. I was so worried. Then this summer I realized my daughter and have completely different style. I pick something for in the store and she shakes her head in disgust. She likes nothing I like suggest. So yeah I think she'll be fine planning her wedding. I'm not even sure she'll let me pick the dress I wear. I think my aunt said it best, all I care about is my name is spelled correctly as far as wedding plans for my children go.

But there is another problem. The other week I was talking with my mom and husband. Out of the blue I said, "I'm starting to think I don't like planning parties". Apparently they've both always known this about me and shared a chuckle that I'm just now figuring it out. If the mother of the bride hates planning parties what to do you do?

There is a popular meme on Pinterest that says, I think everyone who got married before pinterest should get a do over. I when I see it I wonder why I'm even on pinterest if that a requirement?

Although I do love a good party and enjoy going to weddings.

Wednesday, August 12, 2015

No Colombia

Two weeks ago we heard we couldn't move to Colombia for a few months. Legal had to be the buzz kill. But its all good. About a month ago it just started to not feel right.
Which I thought was odd, because it had totally been right before. But what Brent had been saying for months, is I don't know if we are suppose to move or just prepare to move.
Apparently just prepare.
When Brent told me it was a no, I told him he needed to text our neighbor. Our next door neighbor is renting, and has been looking for a house in the area. We "showed" our house to him twice, we had agreed on a price, we hadn't done anything official or legal yet, but he stopped looking and said just let me know by September when my lease is up. So we had a soft offer. I felt terrible that we had to back out of our very soft deal.
We were out of town at the time, and I was nervous to come back because in the past we've been on good terms with him. His little boy plays with Nat, and my baby refuses to not wander in his driveway. (Pray we get good renters next to us next time.)
Last night we talked to him on our front lawns. Brent said, hey, I feel really bad we had to back out. He said, oh no worries. Actually it was freaky what happened. Not an hour after I got your message, another neighbor (He lives two houses down in the other direction) called me. He said we've decided to move, are you interested in buying our house? So now its all official, he bought the house which is on our street. We only told him no two weeks ago.
The interesting thing I've never got the impression he is terribly religious, but you could tell he was trying to make sense of it happening so seamless. In fact, I might have not thought a lot about his story if he wouldn't have been so shocked. He brought it up multiple times how it couldn't be a coincidence and how it was obviously meant to be. Since both conversations happened the same afternoon.
If it wasn't for his bafflement, I might have not though anything about it but now I've been thinking about it a lot. Sometimes I think staying in our house its a terribly boring plan, but that conversation was the last nail I needed in the coffin to tell me this is where my family is suppose to be this year.*
That being said, I also KNOW we needed to go down the path to plan to move to Colombia. Its weird that both choices were so right at the specific time.
Lastly, in total weirdness. The family that is moving, is moving to the same area of town we thought we would buy our next house in if we had the opportunity to go abroad.

 *I think it seems boring being here another year, but I'm not actually complaining. I like my mortgage as far as mortgages go, I like my yard, my trees, my swingset, my kitchen, less stuff, our neighborhood, our elementary school, our friends, our friends from school, our community (although I wouldn't mind a few more liberal friends), my husband's commute, the weather, the views, less stuff in the garage. Its just I never expected to be at the same elementary school going on our 5th year. Soon I might even like my kitchen chairs.

Falling into a Pit

I'm teaching my son's Sunday school class on Sunday. Once I sub, I will have subbed in everyone of my four children's church classes this summer. Never been able to say that before. 
Anyway, the lesson is on the Atonement. It references is an analogy that I've heard since I was my son's age in Primary, about man walking into a pit and a passerby helps him out. 

I like the version Leo McGarry tells in the TV show West Wing better:

"This guy's walking down the street when he falls in a hole. The walls are so steep he can't get out.
"A doctor passes by and the guy shouts up, 'Hey you. Can you help me out?' The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in the hole and moves on.
"Then a priest comes along and the guy shouts up, 'Father, I'm down in this hole can you help me out?' The priest writes out a prayer, throws it down in the hole and moves on
"Then a friend walks by, 'Hey, Joe, it's me can you help me out?' And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, 'Are you stupid? Now we're both down here.' The friend says, 'Yeah, but I've been down here before and I know the way out.'"

Its in reference to substance abuse, but it really hit a chord with me because of depression, and I'll be honest the more I read about mental health the more I think there really isn't much of a difference. 

There is really nothing more valuable that a friend say, "Yeah, but I've been down here before and I know the way out." Whether that friend is Jesus Christ or someone in this world. I guess I would say preferable both. Thankfully I had multiple people helping me out.